Sabtu, 26 Maret 2011

[K767.Ebook] PDF Ebook Read Mark Learn 45 Studies in the Gospel of Mark, by John Blanchard

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Read Mark Learn 45 Studies in the Gospel of Mark, by John Blanchard

  • Sales Rank: #12454091 in Books
  • Published on: 1973
  • Binding: Paperback

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Minggu, 20 Maret 2011

[T841.Ebook] Download Play or Be Played: What Every Female Should Know About Men, Dating, and Relationships, by Tariq "K-Flex" Nasheed

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Play or Be Played: What Every Female Should Know About Men, Dating, and Relationships, by Tariq

Street-smart and straightforward, Play or Be Played will help you get with a king without being a hoochie, groupie, or a chickenhead.

Got Game? It's a fact. Every woman needs game. Take Oprah, Jada Pinkett-Smith, and Beyoncé Knowles. All three of these women have the one intangible quality that every mack, male or female, must possess: they all have game. In other words, they have intelligence, hustle, and common sense that they apply to every aspect of their lives -- especially in their relationships.

Play or Be Played is an instruction manual for women who are tired of being played by men and who want to be players themselves. Though women may not want to play games, the truth is men often do. So women who hope to win in the game of love must first learn the rules. Bestselling author and true mack, Tariq "K-Flex" Nasheed shares:

-ways to spot a scrub
-what it takes to get with a baller
-why men cheat
-how men really judge women
-the top three mistakes women make in relationships

  • Sales Rank: #122848 in Books
  • Brand: Nasheed, Tariq
  • Published on: 2004-02-03
  • Released on: 2004-02-03
  • Original language: English
  • Number of items: 1
  • Dimensions: 8.44" h x .60" w x 5.50" l, .45 pounds
  • Binding: Paperback
  • 224 pages

About the Author
Tariq "K-Flex" Nasheed is the author of the bestseller, The Art of Mackin'. A popular guest on both radio and television, Tariq has been featured in Vibe, Honey, and Source magazines. Mr. Nasheed lives in Los Angeles and can be reached at www.kingflex.org.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
1: What Men Really Want

I was appearing as a guest on this one talk show, discussing my philosophies on relationships, and one of the topics was "How a women can please her man." There were a couple of female authors on the panel who were trying to explain what men want, and how a woman can make them happy, and so on. These women were so off the mark, it was ridiculous.

They were advising women to use all sorts of sex toys, scented powders, exotic oils, and bubble baths. One of the women on the panel actually advised women to use a dildo on their man if they want to get him aroused.

These women were so caught up in relaying their misinformation they didn't even bother to notice the uncomfortable reactions coming from the men in the audience. As I looked around, I saw some of the male audience members cringing as they listened to the nonsense coming from these female "experts." These women were going on about how women can please their men by using candles, rose petals, aroma beads, and the like, until I just broke in and said what was on all the fellas' minds.

"Look ladies, men don't really like none of that stuff. We're relatively simple. If you want to please us, just give us oral sex and food."

The men in the audience erupted into applause. The women on the panel were flabbergasted. One of the female panelists replied, "Well, some men like these sexual accessories." I explained to her that men will tolerate those accessories, because they don't want to do anything to kill the mood. But generally, men can do without all those foreplay items.

Then, one of the ladies made the million-dollar statement that revealed their real agenda.

"Well, what about a woman's needs?"

But the topic was supposed to be about how women can please their man. You see, that's the problem. A lot of women claim they want to know how to please their man, but they really have an ulterior motive.

Ladies, men are very, very simple. If women aren't pleasing their men, it is because they don't want to please their men. If a woman has an Indian-giver mentality, or if she is disingenuous in her motives, men who may be looking at her as a potential mate can sense that.

Many women ask me what it takes to keep a quality man. Yet, when I then ask them, "If you want a quality man, what are you willing and able to bring to the table?" a lot of these women are stumped. At the same time, many of these women have a whole list of "what I ain't gonna do" for a man.

The four most common items on the "what I ain't gonna do" list:

1. I ain't gonna cook for no man ('cause I ain't no slave).

2. I ain't gonna let no man tell me what to do ('cause I ain't no child).

3. I ain't gonna clean no house ('cause I ain't no maid).

4. I ain't gonna suck that thing ('cause I ain't no ho).

Ladies, if you are trying to get into the dating game with any of these hang-ups, you are losing before you begin, and you will be in a perpetual state of frustration.

In order to have a relationship with a quality man, a woman must have qualifications and credentials. Many women mistake having credentials with having potential. Everyone has potential. If you play the lottery, you have the potential to win a million dollars. But if you educate yourself, acquire specific knowledge, and master certain business skills, you then will have the credentials to make a million dollars.

This is why it is important for women to accumulate bargaining chips. Many women in the dating game make the mistake of relying solely on physical attributes to try and maintain a relationship.

Any woman can get a man. But the game a woman has to back up her looks will help her keep a man. When a man is first getting to know a woman, he usually puts her into one of two categories:

1. The potential girlfriend category.

2. The potential sex partner category.

Now the requirements for a woman to be placed in the potential girlfriend category vary, depending on a man's particular wants and needs. Before a man places a woman in this category, he looks at her credentials. And the credentials could include a hundred things. A man might take a woman's educational background into consideration. He might consider her culinary skills. He might take her sense of humor, her diet regimen, her sex appeal, or a host of other things into consideration before he puts a woman into the potential girlfriend category.

But it doesn't take much for a man to put a woman into the potential sex partner category. The requirements are minimal. As a matter of fact, a woman just needs to have two things in order to get placed into the potential sex partner category:

1. A poon-tang

2. A pulse

In most cases, when a woman is first dating a man, if she doesn't meet any of his qualifications to become a potential girlfriend or mate, she automatically gets placed in the potential sex partner category.

On the other hand, a woman in most cases actually has to like something about a man before she will have sexual relations with him, and she will require him to have certain credentials before she gets physical with him. So a lot of women end up thinking that just because a man wants to sleep with them, he must see some special qualities in her as well. Which brings us to:

Play or Be Played Rule #1

A man does not have to like you to have sex with you.

A very common question that I often hear women ask is, "If a man just wants sex, how come he doesn't just say that in the beginning?" The answer is, most men at least have some common sense. Let's be realistic, ladies. Do you honestly think that a man is going to step to you and say "Hey look, I don't really want a relationship with you, I just want to hit that ass?" If he did, you would dismiss him with the quickness. Men know that, so guys at least have enough common sense to know what to say, and what not to say, to get what they want and not salt their own game.

So ladies, it's up to you to figure out what a man's true agenda is, instead of complaining about what he should tell you, and what he ought to be doing.

In order to do this, you have to break relationships down to their basic components. There are basically three types of relationships:


  • 1. emotional
  • 2. sexual
  • 3. financial


That's it. There are relationships for emotional gratification, sexual gratification, and financial gratification.

If you are in a relationship with a person, it will be for at least one of these three reasons. The problems come when the two parties have different relationship agendas. A woman may be dating a man because he is paying her bills, and he may be dating her strictly for the sex. Or a woman might be dating a guy whom she's emotionally attached to, while he is dating her because she gives him a couple of dollars every now and then.

In the ideal relationship the two people dating are on the same page emotionally, sexually, and financially. If there is a deficiency in any one of these areas, and the deficiency has not been rectified, the relationship will be temporary. So ladies, when you start dating a man, you must first be real (with yourself especially) about what your true agenda is. If you are dating a man strictly because of his financial contributions, acknowledge that to yourself. Don't try to justify your agenda by getting into a BS relationship with the person and deceiving yourself into believing that you can learn to like other qualities about the person.

You must also figure out what the other person's true agenda is. Don't leave it up to them to tell you. In any game, you have to at least play good defense until you are absolutely sure that the other person is willing to be on the same team as you.

When you first meet a person, you can't tell if they are with you or against you. And if someone has plans to get over on you, or to get what they can from you without reciprocating, they damn sure aren't going to tell you this up front.

Over 90 percent of all communication is nonverbal. So it's up to you to look and listen very closely to a person's nonverbal language (and not your own hopes and expectations) so you can figure out where they are coming from.

What Do Men Really Want?

Even though people have unique qualities and characteristics, all men have a common thread, and all women have a common thread. Every man has two basic needs: a primal need and a social need. A man's basic primal need is to have an orgasm (I think a lot of you ladies have figured that one out already). And a man's social need is to have power through leadership.

When I say power, I don't mean in an Ike Turner, "sing-the-song-like-I-wrote-it" context. I mean power as far as a man being his own man. I mean power as in being a leader, and not having to conform to anyone. I mean having the power to be the king of his castle. The master of his domain. I mean the power to lead his family in the right direction, and the power to achieve financial freedom.

If a man doesn't utilize his energy to achieve social power, he will settle for just achieving an orgasm. An orgasm gives a man a false sense of power. The basic instinct of every living species is self-preservation. And when a man doesn't have social power, he will resort back to his basic primal need, which is to procreate. And in the mind of a primal thinking man, having an orgasm will ensure his lineage.

Since a man's two basic needs are to have an orgasm and to have power, the level of his game depends on how important one is over the other. Now a man who is disciplined and secure with himself will usually seek out power. But a scrub, or other socially powerless man, will settle for an orgasm.

Now notice I stated that a man's primal need is to have an orgasm, and not just to get coochie (many women erroneously assume that this is basically what all men really want, which causes many women to place a false sense of value on their vaginas). Getting coochie is just the easiest way for a man to obtain an orgasm. But some men will settle for oral sex, hand release, or any other thing that will help them reach an orgasm. Some men with extremely low character will literally bang anything that's moist.

In ancient times, when primitive warriors conquered an opposing tribe or city, they would extend their dominance by conquering the women in the form of rape. And many men still have traits of this primitive mentality today.

In the psyche of a primitive-thinking man, using someone to help him achieve an orgasm gives him a perverse sense of victory. This makes him feel dominant and powerful. Some men have such low character, and are so desperate for power, they don't even care who or what helps them achieve an orgasm.

This is why some men will have sex with crack whores, animals, underage children, and other men, simply because a female isn't available at the time.

For the record, I'm not knocking the gay lifestyle. If a man is living a gay lifestyle, and he is honest with himself about it, I have no problem with that. More power to you. You go girl. Do your thing. But, I do have a problem with a guy who is fronting as if he's straight, by acting mackish and gangsta, but on the DL, he will substitute another man's booty for a vagina if he runs out of other options. In the minds of these men, they don't consider themselves gay (this mentality is prevalent with many men who are in prison).

Men like this will compromise all of their integrity, just to bust a nut. These types of men are what I refer to as caveman players.

In my book The Art of Mackin', I pointed out that the terms pimps, players, and macks are not synonymous or interchangeable. There is a difference between the three. A pimp is a person who is financially motivated. A player is a person who is sexually motivated. And a mack is a person who is knowledge and power motivated. And when a man has knowledge and power, he then has a king's mentality, giving him the option to get sex and money at his whim.

The Difference Between Kings and Cavemen

Thousands of years ago, the Egyptians were the first people to rise above being led by their primal instinct to simply procreate. They utilized that energy to create social order, language, science, and mathematics.

This social structure made it possible for the person who acquired knowledge and power to move higher up on the social totem pole. As evident in the drawings and hieroglyphics left in Egyptian tombs, the men who were more socially powerful received the biggest praise, had more women (or wives), and had more money than the men who had less game.

The Egyptians kings and pharaohs were ancient macks.

In those ancient hieroglyphics, you see them chillin' with three or four women standing by their side. These men were powerful, and they had the respect of their people.

Now, around the same era, in certain European territories, people were still living as primitive cave dwellers.

These cavemen had no game.

They had no social order, no knowledge, and no power. Their main concern was to procreate by any means. Since these cavemen didn't have the game to spit at a female correctly, the only way many of them could get a female was by brute force.

One infamous strategy these cavemen would use involved hiding in the bushes, waiting for a female to walk by, and hitting her on the head with a club. Once the woman was knocked out, the caveman would drag her by her hair into a secluded area, and basically take the coochie.

This was the foundation of Western civilization's approach to man-woman interactions. And even now, guys who have no game, or social power, still use some of these primitive, caveman techniques. There are many examples of how the caveman mentality is prevalent in modern society. One of the most popular TV shows among young men today is Jackass, which is simply about a group of men who do a lot of primitive stunts while torturing each other in the process.

The caveman mentality was also clearly seen a few years ago when following the Puerto Rican Day parade in New York, a large group of men rampaged through Central Park, snatching women's clothes off, then dousing the women with water.

If you go to certain nightclubs today, you will see some guys grabbing on women, literally pulling their hair, and making offensive and aggressive remarks to compensate for a lack of verbal game. So it is very important for a woman to learn how to differentiate a king from a caveman player.

The Main Thing Women Should Look For in a Man

As I stated before, one of man's basic needs is to achieve social power. To become the alpha male. In the wild, the male animal who outfights, outhunts, and overpowers the other male animals becomes the dominant male of his group. And by virtue of being the most powerful, he gets the most respect from the other male animals. Plus, most of the female animals want to procreate with the alpha male, because this will ensure the strength of her lineage.

Human males have this competitive nature as well. This is why men are more intrigued with challenging and combative activities such as sports, politics, war, and the stock market. These things give men social challenges to overcome, and overcoming obstacles and stepping up to challenges builds strength that leads to greater social power.

Once a man has overcome certain challenges, this establishes him as being more powerful than those who could not rise to the challenge. And social power makes a man more desirable to women. Many women have acknowledged that power in a man is an aphrodisiac. When a man has power, he doesn't have to chase women. Women chase him. But when a man doesn't have social power, and he isn't making an attempt to achieve social power, he will waste his competitive energy on dominating coochie -- on finding challenging ways to achieve an orgasm. So the best way to judge a man is to see what he is doing in life to achieve social power, if he is even trying to achieve power at all. Is he disciplined? Is he educating himself? Is he doing anything constructive? Is he proactive? What is he passionate about? These are the questions a woman should ask herself about a potential partner when she first meets him.

If a man isn't focusing his energy on constructive or proactive social activities, then most likely he will utilize all that energy on getting his next orgasm. And having power doesn't necessarily mean being rich. Focusing his energy on something he's passionate about makes a man more confident and self-assured. And when people are knowledgeable and thorough about something that they can contribute to society, they have more power. And the thing that a man is passionate about could seem trivial to other people. But all knowledge is a form of potential power, because we never know when certain knowledge may have to be utilized.

It can be any kind of knowledge. Let's take something as far fetched as, say, beekeeping. Now, there isn't a lot of money in beekeeping, but for beekeepers it's their hobby and it's something that they are passionate about. Other people might look at beekeepers and think that they are strange for having such an odd hobby. But a few years ago in California, there were a number of unprecedented cases of wild bees swarming and attacking people and animals. When the authorities couldn't explain where the bees were coming from and why they were becoming so violent, who did they turn to? That's right. The beekeepers. So now the beekeeper that everyone thought was strange, and that everyone ignored, was suddenly the man, and his specialized knowledge helped save a lot of lives.

It's gratifying for a man to know that his expertise can be an asset to society. A man who seeks social power takes great pleasure in knowing that people will come to him to utilize his specialized knowledge. And if his expertise is sought after on a continual basis, his knowledge has the potential to lead to financial gain, and increased power.

Take a guy who is passionate about computers. People might even label him a geek. But if this geek diddles around on his computer, and creates a software program that everyone becomes interested in, as Bill Gates did, and ends up making over $50 billion, all of a sudden he's not a geek anymore. He's now a mack. That's power. Every man wants to be the best at something, and every man wants to be the leading authority on something.

This is why actors become directors. Salesmen become CEOs. Athletes become coaches. Because once a man has been through the rigors and the difficulties of gaining skills in something he is passionate about, he gets more passion out of teaching, training, and directing others on what he has learned. This is social power.

Another very important trait that women must look for when selecting a potential mate is leadership skills. In order for a man to be a good leader, or to have others respect him and look to him for guidance, it's imperative that he has integrity.

When a man is being led by other people, he has to conform to the rules and standards of the people he is following. If a man is working for an employer, he has to follow the rules and regulations of that employer. If a man is still living with his parents, he has to follow the rules and regulations of his parents. If a man is financially dependent on a woman he is dating, he has to follow the rules and regulations of that woman.

In many cases, following the rules and regulations of others causes men to rebel and want to branch out on their own. Now, it's perfectly normal for a man to want to be self-sufficient and call the shots for himself, because following the rules and standards of others will often limit a person from growing to his fullest potential. But when you become a social "free agent," you have to be disciplined enough to set rules and standards for yourself. This is the basic definition of integrity, and the presence of integrity separates the kings from the cavemen.

It's in a woman's nature to seek leadership in a man, because leadership represents strength. However, this natural instinct causes many women to gravitate toward men who are considered bad boys or thugs, because many men who are considered rebels give off the illusion of leadership.

Anyone can rebel just for the sake of rebelling, so when a man rebels, he should do so in a way that credits his character with integrity. This is an important quality for women to look for in a man. If a man wants to be self-sufficient because he doesn't want any limitations on how high he wants to rise, that's perfectly fine. But having integrity will also ensure that he puts limitations on how low he can sink.

Sports and entertainment are two of the very few occupations in which a person can become extremely successful without the foundation of integrity; and this is why many very successful athletes and entertainers get into trouble with the law.

If a man is to be successful in his position as the president of a Fortune 500 company, he has to have enough integrity to lead employees to handle their duties and responsibilities with an equal level of integrity. But you don't need integrity or leadership skills in order to dribble a ball or write a hit song.

So a lot of ball players, rappers, and singers will use their talents to rise to the top of their field, but many of them will jeopardize it all by getting into trouble over dumb shit that could have easily been avoided. This is why it is essential for a man to have integrity. And this is the main thing that women should look for in a man.

Tip #1 on how women can have game:

Be a queen by always taking full responsibility for your actions and decisions.

No one respects a professional victim, and no man wants to invest in a woman who blames everyone else for her mistakes, because men know that sooner or later, that woman will be blaming them for something. Plus, it shows good character when a woman can take responsibility for her actions and acknowledge any mistakes she might have made. This shows she is willing to improve herself, and reflects a king's own desire to constantly improve himself, and build on his existing knowledge.

Copyright © 2004 by Tariq "K-Flex" Nasheed

Most helpful customer reviews

33 of 36 people found the following review helpful.
Denial is not a river in Egypt
By GWilson
The funniest thing about this book, is that the women that stand to learn the most from it are most likely the same women that wouldn't touch it with a ten-foot pole. Yes, the overwhelming majority of it is good old-fashioned common sense, but as the saying goes, common sense ain't common.

I found Nasheed giving sound arguments and solid answers to questions that I've been pondering since I was fresh out of high school. I liked the way he broke the personalities down into categories that both men and women fall into, and both men and women that have spent the equivalent of a month's time in the dating arena will most likely nod their heads in affirmation of them. No, every single observation he makes doesn't apply to every single man or every single woman, nor do they have to in order to be accurate.

What I liked most about the book, however, is how Nasheed doesn't pull any punches and speaks his mind fully regarding regressive behavior that he's witnessed in the opposite sex, from attempting to get over solely on looks to crippling their children with "ghetto" names, and everything in between. Truth is, Nasheed really isn't saying anything that anyone outside of the group targeted wasn't already thinking anyway, but having access to the venue of publishing affords him a little more freedom than those of us within earshot of said group. Much respect for chapters Four (Are You a Hoochie? Take the Chickenhead Test) and Six (The Victim Hustle).

A wise woman once told me that her mother told her, "When a man cares enough about you to tell you the truth, the least you can do is listen to him." Ladies: if you've been contemplating giving this one a read, then don't be turned off by the negative reviews of the book here. If I were a betting man, I'd bet that most of the reactions to the book displayed here stem from women seeing themselves in Nasheed's words, and not in a flattering light. No collective group of people on the planet likes to be told the truth about themselves, and in the face of the truth, everyone wants to believe that they're the exception and not the rule.

If you prefer someone telling it like it is over what the numbers indicate and political correctness, then you probably won't gather much new material here (because you'll already know the deal), but this is still a quick and very entertaining read, and you'll probably find yourself agreeing with Nasheed repeatedly.

It's also an entertaining read for the guys. (Well, at least it was for this guy.)

13 of 15 people found the following review helpful.
Play or be Played...Understanding Yourself First!!!
By S. Sabrsula
This book was inspirational and very eye opening, an absolute must for any woman of any race!!! It covers everything in a text that is easy to read and easy to understand and/ or apply to life's everyday dealings with the opposite sex.

As it covers all the variety of topics and types of men, the message is for women to look deeper within themselves and take responsibility for the actions at hand. Nothing happens to you that you aren't allowing to happen, or in some cases happening again and again...change your views and habits and look for better men instead of falling for the same lame losers!

This author hits it where it hurts and goes right to the core of the issue, society promotes problems! Quit being alone and work as a couple and family. Deal with the issues at hand and understand there are differences between the sexes, agree to disagree on the small stuff, and if you don't have trust or faith in your man... QUIT INVESTING TIME.

You can't change a cheater no matter how much he begs for your forgiveness...don't die thru your crotch;AIDS or any STD isn't worth a man's infidelity or your trouble to worry about it. Kick a cheater to the curb...'cause the same fate awaits you!

READ THIS BOOK!!! Life's to short to keep staying with or dating neanderthal a**-pickers!

12 of 14 people found the following review helpful.
EACH ONE, TEACH ONE!! GET THIS BOOK AND SCHOOL YOURSELF, LADIES!!
By SoulWriter
I found myself reading the first few pages in a Waldenbooks, buying it and reading it right then and there in the food court at the mall; WORTH EVERY DIME LADIES!!! If you consider yourself a classy, quality lady, and are tired of getting pushed up on by (practically) every ignorant bottom-feeding scrub in a 5 mile radius, or if you look at another sister and wonder what has her so together, THIS BOOK IS FOR YOU. Whether you like the premise or not, Mr. Nasheed is a man with tight game whose goal is to lace the ladies with some strategies on how to get theirs together, period. He keeps it real on what makes you a chickenhead, what type of females there are and how they get that way, and most importantly, HE ALLOWS YOU INTO THE MINDS OF MEN. This book should be REQUIRED READING and has even helped me to find my own king, as well as polish my game up. He has some observations and opinions that some may find offensive, but what you learn is far more valuable in the long run. GET THIS BOOK, DON'T SLEEP!!! (this would be a great stocking stuffer for your clueless, dateless, no self-esteem having girlfriend/sister/cousin who never seems to 'get it.')

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Minggu, 13 Maret 2011

[S737.Ebook] PDF Ebook 1 Corinthians (Baker Exegetical Commentary on the New Testament), by David E. Garland

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1 Corinthians (Baker Exegetical Commentary on the New Testament), by David E. Garland

Paul's first letter to the Corinthians is one of the most important epistles in the New Testament. David Garland's thoughtful new commentary draws on extensive research and engages the best of contemporary scholarship while providing a readable study that will be accessible to thoughtful readers as well as students, pastors, and scholars. After considering the context of the letter and the social and cultural setting of Corinth, Garland turns to his exegetical work. An introduction to each major unit of thought is followed by the author's own translation of the Greek text. In the course of his verse-by-verse commentary, he incorporates references to other ancient writings that help explain particular aspects of Paul's meaning or provide information on the social and cultural context. He also refers to the work of other commentators and provides extensive notes for further reading and research.

  • Sales Rank: #60101 in Books
  • Published on: 2003-11-01
  • Released on: 2003-11-01
  • Original language: English
  • Number of items: 1
  • Dimensions: 9.29" h x 2.02" w x 6.32" l, 2.84 pounds
  • Binding: Hardcover
  • 896 pages
Features
  • ISBN13: 9780801026300
  • Condition: New
  • Notes: BRAND NEW FROM PUBLISHER! 100% Satisfaction Guarantee. Tracking provided on most orders. Buy with Confidence! Millions of books sold!

Review
"The Baker Exegetical Commentary on the New Testament series has set a new standard in reader-friendliness with its attractive presentation that combines detailed exegetical comment on the Greek text with accessibility for those who have little or no knowledge of the original language of the New Testament."

From the Back Cover
"I warmly commend this commentary. I am impressed by its careful scholarship and sane judgments. It offers reliable and constructive exegesis based on a wide interaction with scholarly literature. It retains an eye to theology and to pastoral application, with clear comments and often apt turns of phrase."
-Anthony C. Thiselton, University of Nottingham

"A major achievement. The author displays an enviable grasp of the cultural challenges raised in the letter as well as an assured familiarity with biblical and Greco-Roman sources and the secondary authorities. At the same time his text is both readable and relevant."
-Paul Barnett, teaching fellow at Regent College

"This thoroughly researched, clearly written volume is a fine addition to an already respected series. It will offer seasoned guidance to its grateful readers."
-Charles H. Talbert, Baylor University

"We have come to expect from David Garland work that is well researched, wise in its judgments, and instructive for life and thought. This commentary does not disappoint. Garland's work is fully informed and offers sound and useful discussion of this crucial letter. This commentary is a significant and worthwhile achievement."
-Klyne Snodgrass, North Park Theological Seminary

"Garland makes an outstanding contribution to the BECNT series with this scholarly work on 1 Corinthians. Readers will appreciate the thorough attention given to matters of interpretation in this commentary, especially Garland's careful work with the historical and social backgrounds and with the Old Testament and Hellenistic materials that shed light on Paul's letter. The commentary is written with enthusiasm, insight, and genuine wit, so that readers will enjoy as well as profit from studying this volume."
-Marion L. Soards, Louisville Presbyterian Theological Seminary

About the Author
David E. Garland (Ph.D., Southern Baptist Theological Seminary) is associate dean for academic affairs and professor of New Testament at George W. Truett Theological Seminary, Baylor University. He has authored a number of books, including commentaries on Mark and Colossians/Philemon for the NIVAC series, 2 Corinthians for the NAC series, Reading Matthew, and a forthcoming introduction to Paul. He is also the New Testament editor of the revised Expositor's Bible Commentary.

Most helpful customer reviews

54 of 55 people found the following review helpful.
the best first corinthians commentary that I have encountered
By kleytos
Several years ago (before Garland's book came out) I did a fairly detailed study over about 6 months on the book of 1 Corinthians. I relied fairly heavily on the commentaries by Thiselton and also by Fee. In the subsequent years, I frequently re-read sections of both commentaries. Recently I wanted to get a more clear understanding of the controversial passages about headcovering and women's silence (in chapters 11 and 14, respectively) so I re-read the relevant portions of both commentaries again. I was pretty unsatisfied with both so I went to the library to see if I could find anything else more insightful. Happily, I encountered Garland's book.

Garland's book was much more helpful than either Thiselton or Fee. It was more lucid, kept the same high level of scholarship, and even touched on application! I continued reading the book and have come to the conclusion that it is the best commentary on 1 Corinthians available, for several reasons:

- It interacts with all the major views of a given position without becoming too bogged down (something that I think happens often with Thiselton). It is still a long book, but substantially shorter than Thiselton's.

- Instead of being merely a commentary on commentaries, Garland tries to persuade the reader of the legimitacy of what the author feels is the correct view. In contrast, you can read many 1 Corinthian commentaries and not even know what the author finally thinks!

- It has excellent scholarship with a good degree of balance. Fee, in contrast, holds to extreme views on the controversial women passages (such as arguing that 1 Corinthians 14:33-34 wasn't even written by Paul!).

- Garland lightly touches on application. While the majority of the book is on exegesis, Garland helpfully states the relevance of his conclusions to church life today. Thiselton does not really do this, which is unfortunate.

- His prose is lucid and sharp.

In summary, I believe that Garland's volume is now the best commentary on 1 Corinthians available. Bravo to Baker for this volume. Hopefully other books in the series will have the same standard of quality.

26 of 28 people found the following review helpful.
Execellent Tool Worth Owning
By David A. Bielby
I'm a pastor who preaches through books of the bible. I am just finishing my current series on 1 Corinthians. I've found this commentary to be one that I would not want to work without. It's really one of the best ones I own. I've found David Garland's commentary to be consistently even handed, careful to evaluate the text honestly, and helpful in almost every situation I've used this commentary for. In particular I found this commentary more helpful on his treatment of 1 Corinthians 11, 13 & 15 than most of my other tools on 1 Corinthians. I've been using about 15 different commentaries on 1 Corinthians, including Worthington, Fee, Keener, Thiselton's NIGTC & Thiselton's Short Pastoral Commentary on 1 Corinthians, as well as a bunch of other commentaries like Prior (Bible Speaks Today Series) & Life Application Commentary. All of them have individual strengths, but this commentary, Garland's, has a lot more material than most of the other commentaries (except for NICNT & NIGTC) I own. Not only does it have more material, but most of the material is helpful.

This series of commentaries does one thing that I don't appreciate. The editors have decided to put summaries at the beginning of each segment of the commentary in a medium gray shaded box. This does set apart the text that is a summary of what follows, but it does not copy well on a copier. So if you like a summary and want to use that in a small group discussion you have to lug the entire book in with you. It is also difficult on the eyes to read a few pages of that black print on medium gray background. I just don't like it.

Garland sometimes doesn't summarize his material as well as I would like to see. For example, the section on 1 Corinthians 13 where he introduces his exegetical comments on love has some statements that are meant to summarize what follows, but almost contradict the most important point that follows. They sounded good, but as I thought about them, I became worried that he was going to add to the published material that wrongly defines agape as 'unconditional love'. Sometimes he also spends a lot of time on things that most pastors (at least myself) don't really care about. For example in his discussion on love he gives 23 pages of material. The first 4 pages are his summary, but he never accurately defines love in his summary. He does later on in his detailed exegesis, but in his summary he says things like "Love is concern for their community" and "love is the new aeon already present". He says that love is the marrow of the Christian existence. In the 4 pages of summary material he gives two pages to the discussion of the raging and worthless debate on what kind of literary passage does 1 Corinthians 13 represent. If scholars ever figure that out, will it help us? I think that kind of stuff is pretty much a waste of ink and paper, but that's just my opinion. He obviously thought it was worth half of his summarization of 1 Corinthians 13! But he never got to the point that some have written about...and EVERY scholar publishing articles on agape needs to have the courage to write about the fact that the word agape does not mean unconditional love just because it is the word agape. He didn't say that...although he in essence comes to that conclusion without talking about the unconditional love definition pop myth.

So anyhow, much to my delight when I arrived at his detailed exegesis of 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Garland (to use a baseball metaphor) hits a grand slam home run. He goes to the fine work of Spicq (French scholar and quotes his 3 volume set's article on agape-which has the best definition on agape in print). Theological Lexicon of the New Testament 3 Volume Set (By the way, he doesn't cite Spicq's exhaustive work on Agape. But he is the published authority on detailed study of this term historically and is the most helpful scholar in print on agape. Agape in the New Testament, 3 Volumes

It made me so happy to see Garland pull through and define agape as "demonstration of love" that I wanted to shout 'yes'! He defines agape in this section as something that is not an inner feeling alone, but that it must put itself on display...quoting Spicq verbatim. So he ends up contradicting the summary section of his commentary. Agape is not 'concern for the community'. It is a demonstration of love. I especially love his links to the unmentioned backdrop of the 1 Corinthians passage (Paul doesn't say it in chapter 13), but the clear demonstration of God's love for us all in the offering of his Son on the cross. Bravo!! Pastors-these things preach well! Don't overlook this material. If we goof up the definition of love, we seriously miss what the accurate meaning is of many biblical passages. For 'agape' is a primary theme in the New Testament, if not THE primary theme.

He also handles the 'perfect' term correctly, does not even bother to mention the old view that some amazingly are still teaching to this day...that the perfect refers to the completion of the canon: see the ESV Study Bible notes on 1 Corinthians as an example.The ESV Study Bible

His material should be read before one uses 1 Corinthians 13 in a wedding because it will help a good Pastor preach in a more practical way for a couple.

I say all of this, because sometimes if you are short of time you will be tempted to read just his summaries of a section. I recommend you try to slot enough time to read his exegetical comments in full because of what I have just chronicled on 1 Cor 13.

I wish he had a sub section for each part that gave pertinent links to ancient Jewish and Greek literature with focus on the Apocrypha, Pseudepigrapha, Apostolic Fathers, and 1 Century Jewish authors writing in Greek (like Josephus). I think it would be helpful to have more cross links to these categories. He does bring them into play, but it seems to be more judicious that I would prefer. It would also be interesting to see some material tying into the Hebrew Old Testament terms for love and how this ties in to 1 Corinthians as well as more LXX ties.

I found his treatment of 1 Corinthians 11 to be convincing, noting the difficulty of treating the 'head covering' issue, he lays out a full case for how to interpret that passage, including a simple, yet confirming chiastic outline to support his point. I think I agree with him on that as well. His handling of 1 Corinthians 15 helped me preach on the resurrection and is a worthy aid to any pastor who has to prepare a message for a funeral.

Because some of these passages are usually used in Weddings and Funerals, and I have used them over and over in Weddings and Funerals, I found it interesting to see how Garland contextualizes these passages. I think his links to Paul's purpose in writing remain consistent throughout the book. So you will regularly be reminded of why Paul wrote 1 Corinthians. On 1 Corinthians 13 Garland's comments are superior to Fee's because he correctly defines agape. Fee doesn't cite either of the massive works by Spicq (how can they be ignored?)...but does quote Shakespeare?! This is why it's good to have both commentaries if you can afford it.

One reviewer wrote that this commentary is superior to Fee's The First Epistle to the Corinthians (The New International Commentary on the New Testament) because of his treatment of 1 Corinthians 14:34. I don't know if I agree with that. I believe it's a worthy addition to ones library and that one should read Fee as well as Garland. I don't think I know enough to say which one is superior. I love both of these commentaries. I will say that I also prefer Thistleton's Shorter Commentary First Corinthians: A Shorter Exegetical and Pastoral Commentaryover his NIGTC The First Epistle to the Corinthians : A Commentary on the Greek Text, and I prefer Keener's short Socio commentary 1-2 Corinthians (New Cambridge Bible Commentary) over Witherington Conflict and Community in Corinth: A Socio-Rhetorical Commentary on 1 and 2 Corinthians because he consistently gets to the relevant issue at hand.

If you have $100 budgeted for 1 Corinthians, I recommend Fee & Garland. Then Thiselton's shorter commentary and Keener's shorter commentary. Of all of these I love Garland the best. But they are all excellent. When I am done reading a section by Garland on 1 Corinthians, I usually have the sense that I've just had an objective and helpful look at what scholars say, and what the text actually means, as well as some links for further study on key issues. I think that's likely how you will feel too if you purchase and use this book in your sermon prep time.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
Quite Good
By Philip Bramblet
Garland's commentary is well-written and not difficult to read or understand. Scholarly enough, but very readable. Overall, it is well worth having. I would not, however, recommend its use alone. One should probably have both Fee and Garland, as they complement each other. In some areas, Fee is better; in other areas, Garland is better. My only disappointment was that in some sections, Garland cites a bunch of commentators and scholars but doesn't make his own view sufficiently clear. But on the whole, it is one of the two or three commentaries on 1 Corinthians pastors and Bible students should own.

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Sabtu, 12 Maret 2011

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The first cookbook from Earls is as authentic and approachable as the restaurants are themselves. This book captures the soul and character you feel in every one of the Earls' restaurants--passionate, authentic, accessible and playful, and full of Earls' unique charm. Fans of Earls will be thrilled to make their favourite meals at home, and get a peek inside this iconic restaurant chain.
     Earls invented premium casual dining in 1982 and has been redefining and revolutionizing it ever since with 67 locations (and counting) across Canada and the US. The book will include stories from the restaurant's rich history and feature its most popular recipes. Readers will recognize their favourites, from shared dishes, to sandwiches, soups and salads, noodle bowls and wok dishes, burgers, pizza, main courses, steaks, dessert and brunch. Look for recipes like Pear & Beet Salad, Artichoke Dip, California Shrimp Pizza, Calamari, Potato Skins, French Onion Soup, Nasi Goreng, Tandoori Chicken and Apple Crumble--all complete with mouthwatering photography.
     At last, the food from your favourite restaurant can be yours at home. Read, cook, relax and enjoy this collection of delicious, accessible and easy-to-follow recipes, for fun dishes inspired by food from around the world. The perfect gift for yourself, and the Earls fans in your life.


From the Hardcover edition.

  • Sales Rank: #469372 in eBooks
  • Published on: 2016-11-01
  • Released on: 2016-11-01
  • Format: Kindle eBook

About the Author
EARLS RESTAURANT started as a family-run business, launched by father and son, Leroy Earl "Bus" Fuller and Stanley Earl Fuller in the early '80s, and is also one of North America's most successful independent restaurant groups. Earls has a total of 62 restaurants in Canada as well as US locations in Washington, Colorado, Virginia, Boston, Chicago and Miami. The author lives in Vancouver, British Columbia.

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  • Original language: English
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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, by Dr. Sue Johnson

Are you looking to enrich a healthy relationship, revitalize a tired one, or rescue one gone awry? We all want a lifetime of love, support, and companionship. But sometimes we need a little help.

Enter Dr. Sue Johnson, developer of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and “the best couple therapist in the world,” according to bestselling relationship expert Dr. John Gottman. In Hold Me Tight, Dr. Johnson shares her groundbreaking and remarkably successful program for creating stronger, more secure relationships.

The message of Hold Me Tight is simple: Forget about learning how to argue better, analyzing your early childhood, making grand romantic gestures, or experimenting with new sexual positions. Instead, get to the emotional underpinnings of your relationship by recognizing that you are emotionally attached to and dependent on your partner in much the same way that a child is on a parent for nurturing, soothing, and protection. Dr. Johnson teaches that the way to enhance or save a relationship is to be open, attuned, and responsive to each other and to reestablish emotional connection. With this in mind, she focuses on key moments in a relationship―from Recognizing the Demon Dialogues to Forgiving Injuries―and uses them as touch points for seven healing conversations. These conversations give you insight into the defining moments in your relationship and guide you in reshaping these moments to create a secure and lasting bond.

  • Sales Rank: #35069 in Books
  • Published on: 2014-04-15
  • Formats: Audiobook, MP3 Audio, Unabridged
  • Original language: English
  • Number of items: 1
  • Dimensions: 6.75" h x .50" w x 5.25" l,
  • Running time: 9 Hours
  • Binding: MP3 CD

Review
"A much needed message to all couples and therapists and I recommend it to all."―Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., author of Getting the Love You Want and Receiving Love

"At last, a road map through Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy with its creator. Dr. Johnson's superb science, humor, and clinical wisdom are finally accessible to all of us. I couldn't pick a smarter, warmer, and more real guide for this journey."―John Gottman, Ph.D., bestselling author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and coauthor of And Baby Makes Three

"There's something appealing about this book's honest, no-holds-barred approach. By creating complete emotional safety and by willing to be fearless about it, it seems to me, not only can real love be kept alive, it can flourish"―Boston Globe

Sue Johnson [is] the most original contributor to couples therapy to come along in the last 30 years. This book will touch your heart, stimulate your mind, and give you practical strategies for improving your marriage. It will be an instant classic.―William J. Doherty, Ph.D., author of Take Back Your Marriage

Wonderful!...Hold Me Tight blends the best in research findings with practical suggestions from a caring and compassionate clinician. This fabulous book will be of great benefit...to couples trying to find their way to better communication and deeper, more fulfilling ways of being with each other. Bravo!―Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., author of Parenting from the Inside Out

A truly revolutionary, breakthrough book... the most important, valuable book for couples published in the 21st century.―Barry McCarthy, Ph.D., author of Getting It Right the First Time

About the Author
Dr. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist, the developer of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy, and a recognized leader in the new science of relationships. The author of four books and numerous articles, she has trained thousands of therapists in North America and around the world. She lives in Ottawa, Canada. For more information on Dr. Sue Johnson and Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy, visit www.eft.ca.

From AudioFile
Few audio lessons capture the emotional challenges of love relationships as well as this one by an articulate marriage therapist. Focusing on troubled relationships, it shows how couples can stop fighting, deal with vulnerabilities, resolve and heal old injuries, build secure connections, and develop relationship strengths. These remedies are anchored to a sensitive explanation of the underlying attachment issues that provide both joy and frustration in romantic relationships. Sandra Burr is an outstanding choice to read this excellent guide. Her vocal security and tasteful dramatic skills don't overshadow the main ideas in each section, even when she's handling the frequent dialogue. She sounds appealing in a maternal sort of way, and her seriousness constantly reminds us that essential information is unfolding. T.W. © AudioFile 2008, Portland, Maine

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290 of 301 people found the following review helpful.
Take it from a couple's counselor - this book is a gem!
By Shari Levine
Hold Me Tight teaches couples how to hear their partner's deepest concerns, "are you there for me", "am I really important to you", "is our relationship secure and solid" when those concerns are expressed through criticism or content. It reminds partner's that all communications are attempts to connect, no matter how badly delivered. In this way, Susan Johnson teaches couples to read below the surface of a complaint down to the attachment need being expressed underneath. When attachment needs can be faced and processed directly, couples feel closer. Johnson offers couples in couples counseling an adjunctive support system in addition to the therapy hour. Hold Me Tight is also an excellent resource for couples working things out on their own. It provides a clear and solid guideline for repairing hurt and restoring connection. I am recommending it to the couples in my practice, and the reports coming back about how helpful and transformative Johnson's approach is have been glowing!

222 of 235 people found the following review helpful.
Better Than The Rest
By Allan M. Lees
The problem with therapy and relationship books is that they are all the equivalent of medieval "medicine." There is no science, no data-driven outcomes, no predictive hypothesis testing and hence no real progress. Every practitioner has their own set of nostrums, some helpful and some absurd, just like every witch-doctor has his own set of feathers and fetish items. Step forward Sue Johnson. Although she has taken only baby-steps towards a true scientific model of attachment relationships, it's welcome progress indeed. Unlike the vast majority of her peers, she grasps that our behaviors have been fashioned by selection pressure over the millennia. She looks for why such behaviors should have adaptive value, and this enables her to side-step the mumbo-jumbo of co-dependence, inappropriate behavior, etc. and get right to the heart of what seems to be going on between couples when their relationship is in trouble.

For people who want confirmation that their partner is "too clingy" or "too cold" or whatever, this is not the book for you. Nor is it a "why you should be strong and suck it up" book. It is about our basic needs, our need for at least one other adult human being to be there for us when we need it. It is about why we're wired up to be that way, what kinds of behaviors result from this hard-wiring, how things can go wrong, and how things can be fixed. At the heart of the book is Johnson's vision of us as all needing at least one refuge, one place of safety and support in an otherwise indifferent and cold universe. Unfortunately, for most people, marriage or an equivalent domestic relationship fails to provide this refuge because we keep misunderstanding our partner's needs and impulses - and very often we misunderstand our own too.

Johnson recognizes the futility of trying to change communication patterns or patterns of surface behavior when the fundamentals remain unaddressed. She walks the reader through the stages of self-understanding and then partner-understanding. She uses simplified examples from her own case histories (sometimes rather too glib) to demonstrate behavior patterns and how they can be modified and improved so that both parties can get closer to the heart of the matter.

Eventually, we'll arrive at a soundly-based science of interpersonal behavior that uses mathematical models to (i) elucidate, and (ii) predict our behaviors, at which point we'll have the possibility of truly effective therapy and also understand the fundamental limits of therapy. After all, there are plenty of things in this world that can't be fixed no matter how hard one might try. But until that day arrives, Johnson's book is a welcome precursor and a valuable tool for anyone who cares about their relationships and hopes to find a true loving refuge in which lasting love can be recrafted every day.

140 of 154 people found the following review helpful.
Same message, new terms
By JFDATL
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is currently in fashion among couples therapists, and Sue Johnson is one of its chief architects. In Hold Me Tight, which is offered as a guide (including exercises at the end of each chapter) for couples to work through EFT on their own, Dr Johnson presents "seven conversations for a lifetime of love."

When all of the clever labels designed to help promote the brand are stripped away--"the demon dialogs," "freeze and flee," "hold me tight"--the advice comes down to this: communication with your partner in which you can be vulnerable, risk showing your frailties, and make yourself emotionally available should open the door to reciprocity by your partner and communication of deep emotional intensity, an opportunity for sharing, bonding, and building trust.

Communication in which partners are closed and defensive, on the other hand, closes the possibility for genuine emotional connection and can set off destructive spirals of recrimination and defensiveness, leading in turn to feelings of alienation and separation and, in the most severe case, dissolution of the relationship.

Any of us who has ever done "work" on ourselves or on our relationships has heard this before, and we understand the fundamental wisdom of trying to get in touch with ourselves, with our feelings, and of having the courage to give our partner access to those inner-most, most intimate places, to be willing to stand before our partner emotionally naked, trusting that they will not take advantage of our vulnerability, that they will not reject us, that they will, in a healthy relationship, embrace us.

For those who have not yet gotten to this place in the program, Sue Johnson's explanation is as lucid and usable and sensible as any, though the writing is sometimes clumsy--a social-scientific researcher trying to bring her work to a popular audience perhaps. The stories, while they may all be accurate representations of therapy sessions Dr Johnson has had with clients, seem pat and contrived, each one resolves neatly as if in a television drama: "Oh, Ricky …." Here's the basic formula: In therapy, one partner complains about the behavior of the other; the indicted partner reacts badly causing the complaining partner to suddenly open up and reveal the hidden significance of their hurt. On seeing the complaining partner so vulnerable and exposed, the indicted partner has an epiphany, allows his/her heart to open completely to the complaining partner, there is a warm embrace, literal and/or metaphorical, and the relationship is on the road to recovery.

In a concluding chapter, Johnson is honest that the moment just described is not a permanent or even a guaranteed cure: relationships require continuing work on the part of both parties. Even so, at least in Hold Me Tight, Johnson fails to acknowledge the possibility of cases in which this moment never occurs, cases in which at least one partner is so deeply guarded emotionally that his or her reaction to the other partner's vulnerability cannot be the healing embrace, but even greater defensiveness and withdrawal. Such an admission wouldn't be good for book sales. Hold Me Tight depends on optimism.

One very valuable feature of Hold Me Tight, a lesson that many of us, even those of us who have done some "work," may not have heard often enough: Sue Johnson is in league with a growing number of therapists and counselors coming from a number of different perspectives, determined to undermine forty years or so of thought that has told us that self-sufficiency is a hallmark of mental health; that our goal should be to get ourselves to a state where we do not need a relationship; that then, and only then, are we truly ready for a relationship. Anything short of a relationship built on mutual self-sufficiency is mere co-dependency. Johnson and others argue that we are hard-wired for connection, and they rely on some findings of contemporary neuro-science to bolster their argument. One only wonders how we would have ignored Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which features "belongingness and love" so prominently, for so long. Some of us will find it a relief, in our imperfect condition, to at last, be given license to seek a relationship without the foregone judgment that because we want it, we are unhealthy, and because we are unhealthy, any relationship we enter must therefore be unhealthy.

Parts I and II of Hold Me Tight give the reader the "seven conversations for a lifetime of love" that are the core of Johnson's book. Part III seems tacked on. It includes special cases, such as the chapter on trauma, and a concluding chapter, but the fundamental formula remains the same: one partner risks vulnerability; the other partner recognizes the real emotional content of behaviors and offers a healing embrace. The consistency of the theme raises the question Are these special cases really special after all?

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